Recently, I picked up people-watching, which sounds creepy until you realize I’m basically doing unpaid research.

It started because I got tired of scrolling on my phone while waiting for things, so I started looking around instead. Then I realized, real life has better writers than Netflix! I’ve seen first dates crash in under ten minutes, couples argue using only their body language, and someone who took at least 47 selfies in the same pose for a full minute.

My favorite game has become guessing everyone’s story before they leave. Like, that woman aggressively stirring her iced coffee? Definitely got a “good morning beautiful” text from a man she blocked twice.

I don’t judge anybody, though, because somewhere out there, somebody is probably watching me and thinking, “Now what is her problem?”